Oh my darling Morrissey has ‘retired’ though I doubt the duration of it he is sitting in LA chillin’ like a villain. I love you, dude you-do-you.
Now, the pop hit “Moves Like Jagger” may have the teenage girls squealing but let’s face it, dancing is pretty funny. Jagger dances like a chicken. Dancing rockers are hilarious, the head bang , the fist pump, the bootie shake. A riot. I’m speaking of men here. Trying to be cool with air guitar. Chicks are different- they just suck anyway but Hayley of Paramore dances like a man so she falls in to the male rocker category too.
But the king? The king is right here my friend Stephen Patrick Morrissey. The Moz who brings dance to a whole new level. Something not even human. A slow motion pants acid trip that buts the character Elaine from Seinfelds “thumbs up dance”to shame. There is no dance funnier or more perplexing than the one in the video below.
But wait, it gets better. So better that Smiths partner Johnny Marr actually ditches his guitar to join in this foot waggling arm raising catastrophe. The audience.. how I wish I could see their reactions, were they awed or were they falling over in laughter. Ever see the “November Spawned a Monster” dance? The dude humps a tree. I have no idea where his rhythm comes from but I do know there is a slight disconnect in its dance translation. Why are there not blogs dedicated only to ‘The Morrissey Dance’? Its fantastic. I have never laughed harder at a rock clip and I have never loved Morrissey more just for the sheer ‘dance like no ones watching’ mentality of it all. What’s not to love?