U2 To Break Up, Bono And The Edge To Continue Working Together

Written by | April 1, 2016 5:11 am | No Comments


At a hastily convened press conference this morning, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr informed a dazed by lack of sleep contingent of local reporters in Dublin, that they had quit U2. “Perhaps those guys can call themselves U1, perhaps they can go fuck themselves, but that’s it we’ve had enough and we are going our separate ways.

An hour later Bono and the Edge posted a on the U2 website an official statement.

“After 40 years of rock and roll, U2 have called it quits and like any divorce, it is sad and heartbreaking, full of reproach and hurt feelings but we hope and pray one day we can all be friends again as we were back in the day in Dublin, during the troubles.

“For now The Edge and Bono will continue work on their epic multi-media experience “The Troubles And Me”, as the other two decide what to do without U2 to prop them up.

“Love And Peace, U2”

The break up was, indeed, extremely acrimonious. Clayton called the two “an egomaniac asshole and his sycophantic asshole lap dog.” Something rock nyc has been claiming for years.

Now that the story is finally over please God don’t let them reform.

Meanwhile, Achtung Baby is still a masterpiece…




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